The Rant!

17 05 2010

Ok, here we go. I have to rant…., I have to get this thing off my chest or I may end up committing infanticide (ok, he’s not an infant, but he is my son). Yes Alex, this week you get to star in my blog. Just what kind of deal did you make with the devil, anyway. When is your soul due in payment of services rendered? My God man, how long is this unbelieveably lucky streak of yours going to continue? Oh, I’ve heard the excuses, everyone’s heard the excuses, (I was justified in this…, I was justified in that…), but the truth is that no matter how hard you try and justify, we all have eyes and a brain and we can see what’s really going on. Do you know why you won last year and are leading by a wide margin this year? It’s because when you combine an aggressive game with a consistently lucky streak, you can’t be beat. It doesn’t matter what cards you or I get, 75% of the time, you will win, just because you’re Alex. Friday’s example is the perfect summing up of what you’ve been doing to everyone for the past 2 years. You raise with a Q8 offsuit, and then call my pre-flop all-in, and after the 5 cards are turned up, you shit out a Royal Flush to my trip Aces. I wish I lived in Alexland, I’d be buying lottery tickets left and right. The fact is that this was the most extreme example of the kind of luck you’ve been having, but you pull off shit like this time and time again. You don’t believe me? Blinded by your own success? You think this is just me going off? Just ask any of the other guys. Go on, ask them? I dare ya. The truth can be hard to take sometimes. And don’t let this ‘Donk of the week’ thing fool ya, the names may change every week, but we all know who the donk of the past 2 years has been. In this case, don’t think of me as your dad, think of me as the conscience of the group.

That having been said, please don’t get offended by what I just wrote. Personally, you know that I love you and that I would give my life for you a thousand times over. But when you’re sitting at the poker table with me, you’re just another player who I wanna beat. I also realize that there’s not a helluva lot that you can do about what’s been happening. You’re riding on top of a big wave and there’s no reason why you should even consider wanting to get off. My reason for writing this rant is twofold; Number 1: I needed to get this off my chest for my own sanity’s sake, and Number 2: Try to get you to understand that what has been happening has as much to do with your own skill as it has to do with luck. Trust me when I say this, because when the cards turn sour for you (and they will…. at some point), you won’t go into a deep poker depression and quit the game like Dustin did because he couldn’t win anymore (I know, Dustin claims that it’s lack of funds, but you and I both know why he quit).

So please understand that I am happy for you with your success, and I would want nothing but success for you in anything that you do. But when shit like this happens to me when I play against you on a consistent basis, at some point I have to vent. I am just sorry that it’s you that I’m ranting about, and not Lum. I’d much rather be going off on him than on you. I’m sure that he would be more that happy to be ranted on, because that would mean that he was the one who was up $450 after 20 weeks.

There, I’ve spoken my mind. This blog is mine dammit, and I’m exercising my right to free speech! Next week’s game is at Lum’s House of Pain, unless we get cancellations in which case it will be at Jack’s House of Mild Discomfort. Speaking of cancellations, if anyone can’t make it to the game, please let me know ahead of time (through this blog or telephone) so that we can invite others, etc. I am now instituting a new feature called ‘Car Babe of the Week’. It’s got nothing to do with poker, but hey, we’re guys and we like cars AND babes, so sue me.

This week’s Car Babe of the Week:

This week’s stats:


SpiC Out!




15 responses

17 05 2010
Jack "the Master"

I suggest you remove the picture of the little girl before we are all arrested as pedohiles

17 05 2010

I don’t really give two shits what anyone thinks of how I play poker or how lucky I’ve gotten in the past three years of playing this game with you all. Dad is right, you people are not dumb, you have eyes & a brain in which you can see & judge for yourself how lucky or unlucky any of us have been. I’ve been up & down all year long. (even though it doesn’t appear that way) I get lucky & unlucky throughout each & every game, just like ALL of you.

If you were to play a game of poker for six hours straight, obviously anyone could win that particular game because luck could play a big role in one single game. Dave could win $200 in one night but it doesn’t mean he isn’t a fish. But if you were to play consistantly for six hours a game & all year long, that is when you start noticing who the better players are. Luck plays a role in a short period of time but not in the long run. That’s when the skill factor takes over.

In the three years that we’ve been playing, I have played 94 games. That’s roughly 5-6 hours per game. We play roughly 75 hands per night. That’s around 520 hours of poker that I have played with almost all of you.

SO…. You can say what you want about me being the luckiest player in the past 3 years or you can call me a consistant donkey or whatever else you have to throw at me. But I will say to you once again, that statistics DON’T LIE. That’s why we do the stats after every game. So we can see how we play on a nightly basis & make certain changes to our games to better it. Also,
you guys don’t see the hands that I muck so you don’t know what I’m folding a lot of the times. So how can you say that I’m consistantly lucky if you don’t get to see my cards when they hit the muck?

On a different note, I would like to apologize to everyone for being such a fucking brat at times or being ungrateful for my run the past two years. I am a very competitive person & as you’ve seen before I don’t really like losing. I’ve been under a fuck load of stress the past few months & I didn’t mean to flip out at my Dad the other week. It just came out & I fully regret saying what I did. So Dad & everyone else at the table, I am very sorry for being a douche bag.

Something else has come to my attention. It appears to me that a few of you guys are sick of me. Also I was told not to come play with you guys anymore by one of you. I’m sure it was a joke but for someone to make a joke like that it means that you’ve given it some thought. So if you don’t want me around, just say so, I will gladly fuck right off.


18 05 2010

Alex, you are an original member of this gang and if you left we would all be poorer for it (not in money though, if it was in money then we’d all be richer!). I don’t know who suggested that you leave but I sure as hell hope that he was kidding, ’cause if he wasn’t then it would be better if he left. But I can’t think of any of our guys saying that seriously. On a different note, the denials and justifications continue spewing out of your typing fingers…, as predicted. I stand my ground Alex, as you stand yours. We’ll see what the future brings.

18 05 2010
mr angry

gentlemen, fuck, who am i kidding? you’re all douche bags! as you know by now, i am merely the angry asian only in name.
first, beef, i don’t think you think i want you out. although there is a definite correlation with my winning when you are not around in the last six months! i would not be happy if you quit! even though i am doing poorly right now, i want you around, ok? i have never had the feeling that any of us want you out. every dog has their day, yours has been running for a few years that’s all.
now, my real beef is mauro, you can have my name if you want. the angry italian suits you better right now. this is a gentlemen’s game amongst good friends. now i apologize to you for telling you to fuck off on numerous occasions and other things. but it is annoying when you can’t let go of certain hands. it’s just a game! so i would really appreciate it if you would stop calling me names and other insults. it is grating and just creates a negative atmosphere for everybody and me. can you understand? didn’t you go through this with mr eel? it’s no fun. thank you old buddy!
also, having given this a lot of thought afterwards, the last hand of the night. the jack ruling of keeping quiet during play. your undue influence, i do believe did play a big part in my thinking. i did not want to appear to take your advice but i was sure thinking about it and i was pretty damned sure alex only had an A with a K kicker like me. but you wouldn’t stop talking and telling me what to do. how can i think when you won’t stop talking?
alex, when i tell you to fuck off, i say it love.
mr eel, most father’s would be proud of their son kicking ass. unfortunately, you get in his way! why don’t you save some grief and just fold every time he raises? i’d be honoured if my son royal flushed me! lucky you didn’t have much money at the time!
there, i am vented. angry italian? your thoughts?

19 05 2010
The Man In Retirement

Carlos stats don’t lie. and although I have left the game and was on a losing streak, which had only gone on for 6 games or so, i still was one of the players with an upward trend on my stats. You try and throw me in to add validity to your rant and to show how you are Mr. masculine and a champ for putting up with Alex. well sir the fact of the matter is that whatever you feel, the kids a good player and clearly as the stats will show has the number on a few of you fellows or he wouldn’t be doing so well. luck plays a part but no one won the world series purely on luck, and yes clearly this is not the world series but the point being made is that at some point one has to put their bitter feelings regarding someones playing aside and come to realization that the person is better than them.

I in not means am coming in here to defend Alex… nor do i wish to bash you…

So i finish MY RANT!! with two points to consider.

1: If you’re going to include me into one of your rants at least do it with some style and don’t just say the same shit you always say about me. Be creative, think of others.

2: Fucking suck it up princess. The only reason this is a problem is cause its your son. So put your pride aside.

Love your Nephew (The “Cheap” “Broke” “Quitting” Retiree) who quit for reasons which you all know… apparently.

You responding tho this would be futile. I’m more of a smart-ass than you, therefore no matter how you respond ill have something far superior to say.

19 05 2010

Oh, I’ll respond alright, but not right now because I’m working. But on a side note, this what a successful blog should be about. Controversy with a heated debate and differing opinions. Keep it coming boys!

19 05 2010

comments need your OK

19 05 2010

I will respond one point at a time.

‘Stats don’t lie’:
Correct…, but they also don’t distinguish between luck and skill. Stats merely show how you’ve been doing, whether it’s luck, skill, or in Alex’s case, both. If you care to read my blog again, you will notice that nowhere in the blog did I say that Alex WASN’T a skillful player. He is good, but his skill is not the only thing responsible for his almost unassailable lead in money over the rest of us. Luck has been a large factor in his success. To say that it hasn’t would be of the highest calliber of egotism.

‘Upward trend on your stats’:
Uh, excuse me, but I always thought that an upward trend meant that you were doing better than before. The stats show the exact opposite. Remember, stats don’t lie.

‘Bitter feelings’:
My bitter feelings would apply to anyone who has had as much luck as Alex has had against me. But again, as I have stated in the blog, this is not a personal attack on Alex because it’s not something that he can do anything about. If he is blameless, (which he is), how can I possibly harbour any bitterness towards him? My bitterness is aimed at the poker gods. I would just like to have a fair shot when I’m in a hand with him.

‘Realization that the person (Alex) is better than them (us)’:
Alex is better than one or two of us, but to say that he is a more skillful player than all of us smacks of brown-nosing. Have you got anything to gain by saying something as absurd as this? Alex himself would never be as egotistical as to say something like that (even though he may think it). Maybe he is better, or maybe he isn’t, but only in the long-term (years), will that information be found out.

‘I in no means am coming in here to defend Alex’:
You’re perfectly entitled to, you two are like brothers, and whether you like it or not, best friends.

‘If you’re going to include me into one of your rants’:
Where do I start with this one? I have the right and freedom to put anyone of you guys in my cross-hairs, and I always do it with style. As far as saying the same things about you, let me put it this way; if the same things are being said about you, then maybe there’s some merit to it. ‘Nuff said.

‘The only reason this is a problem is cause it’s your son’:
Wow! This is such an ignorant statement that I’m not even gonna comment on it.

‘Love your nephew’:
You and I are more alike than not, how could I not love you. Expressing feelings and discussing things, whether agreed or not, has no bearing on my love for you or for Alex. The love is there WITHOUT QUESTION.

‘…who quit for reasons which you all know’:
C’mon Duj, let’s be honest here. Last year you quit when you had a very realistic chance of winning a share of the trophy. How do you explain that, except to say that you lost interest in the game. This year you were all gung-ho about joining us again and then after a few unsuccessful games, decided to quit again. Alex is broker than you, yet has that ever stopped him from playing at least 80% of the games? Look at the stats again. Our losingest player (Dave), has lost an average of $8.77 per week in a total of 78 games with us. Even if you were to be as shitty as Dave (sorry Dave), losing $8.77 a week is not gonna break your bank. THAT’S why I mentioned you in the blog. We like you, you’re a cool guy, and we miss your company in our games.

Regarding the ‘PS’, I say only this: Your fantasies are getting in the way of logic. You must address this.

Fucking SpiC Out, Man!!!!!!! Ya Baby!!!!!

19 05 2010
An iTALiAN with Many Sides


Ken I’m sorry I called you names and other insults.
I promise not to call you names and other insults and if it accidentally
happens I promise not to let it go passed a max of two hands after the
infraction has occurred.
I would also like to apologize to everyone else for creating a negative
atmosphere that only the Dark Sith Lords could appreciate and will
try harder from sliding towards that dark side.



“i do believe did play a big part in my thinking”
You weren’t thinking, you were scared.
“i did not want to appear to take your advice”
Even if I had given any advice you were to busy being scared to receive it.
“how can i think when you won’t stop talking?”
I wasn’t talking and you were scared. When one is scared they think
everyone is taking.
Your confusing thinking with scared.

Why don’t you tell the class the real influence behind your pitiful play.
ScaredPussy comes to mind.
The truth will set you free.



You all have a great week and I’ll see you on friday.
May your suckoutness be plentiful

Yours Truly



Beef your oldman is in denial
Just a bad attempt at gaining some momentum
There are those who appreciate the finer points of the game
He used you, don;t send him a Xmas card


19 05 2010

Hey master of the blog site
apparently one of comments is waiting moderation
It’s probably due to all the bad words I used in response to Ken

19 05 2010

Worry not, Italian One. I have the settings set so that only your 1st comment to the blog gets held up. Once I approve it, all subsequent comments will go through.

19 05 2010

OK so were is my 1+1=3 comment
and how come I can’t pick a picture
this is bullshit man, what the fuck is that green thing

19 05 2010

One World Order!

19 05 2010
mr angry

the bottom line is you were excessively talking and unable to stop talking trying to influence me with your unsolicited advice, correct? why don’t we confirm this with those present? contrary to the agreed rules that you confirmed when i spoke out and asked permission at the table to talk to carlos the previous week. i remember clearly you jumped in with jack to enforce and confirm the rules, correct? do not justify or cover your wrong actions.
scared pussy? are you out of your fucking mind? $24? this is just a fucking game with friends for 5 hours of our lives each friday night.
be a good sport, win or lose. don’t carry it with you. you will live longer.
mr eel is the prime example. he was such an arrogant a-hole when he was riding high. losing to him was extremely annoying because of his high and mighty attitude. but as fate would have it, his losing streak was so severe and punishing that it sent him to such depths of depression that he landed in the hospital on suicide watch. ok, take out the suicide watch but it sounded really good! anyway, he is such a gentleman when he wins or loses now. i’d say he has been almost enlightened other than his father/son issues.
mauro, you cheap bastard, bring some of those cookies that i like that your mother makes.

20 05 2010

Wow I will call this The Mount St Helens Blog ; more substance here than the last couple of months. Ya gotta luv it. I like to see these friendly exchanges where familiarity has earned the right to speak candidly. Alex, you aint goin nowhere, no one want you to quit. Dustin, would like to see you rejoin the game. You both bring a youth and humour that our game would sorely miss without you. The emotion does run high at times but wtf ; we are not robots nor do we have pointy ears and god what do you expect when you mix up portugese, italians, asian, irish and scots in a room with money at stake. Some might say a battle royale or cage match. I say all things considered we keep it pretty low key. I may not make it Friday. Suzy has mentioned she would like to head off for the long weekend but we will see. Good Luck to all. May the poker gods not pee on your head

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